50 Halloween Jokes for Kids
Posted by Kelsey Caldwell
Replace fright with fun when you share Halloween jokes with little monsters!
The air is getting cooler and Halloween is just around the corner. Now is the perfect time to break out some candy-corny jokes to make this holiday a little less scary for young kids. Halloween shouldn’t just be all about the trick, so be sure to treat your family to some hilarious jokes that are sure to raise your spirits. These 50 Halloween jokes will make your little witches cackle with glee and your little ghosts howl with laughter.
- Why are ghosts so bad at telling fibs? Because you can see right through them!
- What’s a pumpkins favorite sport? Squash.
- Why do witches wear name tags? To tell which witch is which.
- What did the ghost say when it fell down? I got a boo-boo.
- Why do witches fly on brooms? Because vacuums are too heavy.
- Which band is a zombie’s favorite? The Grateful Dead.
- What kind of muffins do ghosts like? Boo-berry!
- Why did the vampire leave the restaurant? Because they served him a stake-sandwich.
- What do witches study in school? Spelling.
- Why did the skeleton skip the prom? Because he had no-body to go with.
- How do little pumpkins cross the road? With the help of a crossing gourd.
- What’s it like being kissed by a vampire? It’s a pain in the neck!
- What do ghosts wear when their eyesight starts to go? Spooktacles!
- Why don’t zombies eat clowns? They taste funny!
- What do you get a witch for her birthday? A charm bracelet.
- Why did the skeleton laugh? Somebody tickled it’s funny bone.
- What kind of music do mummies listen to? Wrap music.
- Who rules the pumpkin patch? The Pumpking.
- Who do monsters buy cookies from? The ghoul scouts!
- What did one ghost say to the other? Get a life!
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- What do you call two witches who live together? Broom-mates.
- What did the skeleton bring to the cookout? Spare ribs.
- Who did Frankenstein bring to the prom? His ghoul-friend.
- What has hundreds of ears but can’t hear a thing? A cornfield.
- Where should you hide if you’re being chased by a zombie? The living room.
- What is a baby ghost’s favorite game? Peek-a-BOO.
- Why did the vampire go to the dentist? Because he had bat breath!
- Where do witches park? In the broom closet.
- Why was the skeleton afraid of the dark? Because it had no guts.
- What can you catch from a vampire in the winter? Frostbite.
- Where do ghosts go on holidays? The Boohamas
- What did the skeleton say to the bartender? “I’ll have to beers and a mop, please.”
- Where do baby ghosts go during the day? A dayscare center.
- What do you call vampire siblings? Blood brothers.
- What kind of cars do zombies drive? Monster trucks.
- Why do demons and ghouls hang out so much? Because demons are a ghoul’s best friend.
- What’s a skeleton’s favorite instrument? A trom-BONE.
- What kind of dog is a vampire’s favorite? A blood-hound.
- What do skeletons fly around in? A skelecopter
- What did the fisherman say on Halloween? Trick or trout!
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- What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert? I scream.
- What says “ha ha ha” right before a big crashing sound and then keeps laughing? A monster laughing its head off.
- Why are skeletons so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin.
- What do you call a chicken that haunts your house? A poultrygeist.
- Why didn’t the mummy have any friends? Because he was too wrapped up in himself.
- Why didn’t the vampire attack Taylor Swift? Because now she has bad blood.
- What’s a ghost’s favorite meal? Spook-ghetti
- Why did the witches baseball team lose? Because all their bats flew away!
- What do you get when you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter? Pumpkin Pi.
- What is a scarecrow’s favorite fruit? Straw-berries!
This Halloween, you can delight trick-or-treaters with these spooktacular jokes!
Kelsey Caldwell is a realtor and freelance writer from Charlotte, NC. She and her husband are parents to two amazing kids, a puppy, and a rabbit.
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